To receive a cancer diagnosis is shocking and numbing. I can tell you that hearing it for the second time wasn’t any easier. In fact, in some ways it was harder to hear.
Have you seen that commercial where the doctor tells the woman she has cancer and suddenly the doctor is muted out? You can see his lips moving but you can’t hear a single word he is saying. In reality, that is exactly what happens. You really don’t hear anything your doctor says after the words, “You have cancer.”
Fortunately, I have the support of loved ones to get me through. This second time, having learned to lean on the strength of those that love me, I remained coherent enough to ask the hard questions, to receive the heartbreaking answers, and to make the difficult decisions that will affect me for the rest of my life.
Family. Friends. Partners. These are our loved ones. (most days!)
When you face a crisis of any kind – whether it be personal, financial, your health, it is in these times that a person is defined; both as a giver and a receiver.
That old familiar saying comes to mind.
“It is in these moments that we truly know who our friends are.”
And that is sad but true. Some scatter to the winds, never to be heard from again. Some put distance between you and them, clearly letting you know what they are able to give at that point in their life. And that has to be okay.
We should not judge those of our loved ones that are not available to us. We have not walked in their shoes. We do not know what is going on in their lives. Just be gracious and willing to accept what they can give.
Those that truly love you and are available to expand their world to encompass you, will close ranks around you. Your loved ones are there to shelter you, to love you, to protect you, and to help you in any way that they can with whatever means they have available.
Now for your part, the hard part. It sounds simple and obvious, but you must be willing to accept the love and support that is offered to you.
For some of us, me included, that is not an easy thing to do. In most cases, we are not brought up learning how to receive. To make matters worse, I am a fiercely independent person. To be able to distinguish between the perception of being weak and being smart enough to know how healing those intentions of love and giving are, takes time, experience, trust, and most of all, love.
If there was just one message I could share with you it would be for you to please know that love and support given freely, with intention, have powerful healing capabilities. And we could all use a little more of that!
If you have enjoyed reading my post, please donate to my crowdfunding efforts to pay for my medical expenses. Thank you. GOD bless.